Tryin' to face the strain

I've been wearing makeup and contacts lately and dressing nicely for some stupid reason (because I want to feel pretty, let's just admit it). I don't want to admit it, so I say I'm doing a "social experiment." I've gotten compliments.

"No one wants you, girl." I wonder if that actually got to me, if a creepy guy on the train who seemed like he wanted to mug me and then rape me (he donned a mask) somehow changed my opinion of myself. He shot it at me as he was leaving the station. I was waiting by the CTA booth in case he decided to try something. Usually I try to calm myself down about these things, thinking it's just paranoia, but I think this one was justified.

He sits down in front of me, apparently done panhandling, and faces me.
"Hey," he says.
I glance up, raising my right eyebrow. "Hey," I say nervously, and go back to playing my DS.
"You going anywhere?"
Well, I am on the train. "Uh, I'm going home." I look around. We're the only people in this car.
"Do you have a boyfriend?" Smooth guy.
"...Yes," I say. You always gotta say that, even though I'm a single woman now.
"Well... what he don't know won't hurt him."
My mouth opens a little in surprise, and I take a second to answer. "Sorry, I'm really not interested in that."
This is when he stands up and pulls a mask out of his pocket. Not a ski mask, but something like a Zorro mask. He starts to put it over his eyes, and lowers it at my stunned look.
"What?" he asks. "What?" he keeps saying. He's getting a kick out of this, I can tell.
I get up, and my hands shake as I try to figure out how to work the goddamn emergency entrance to the next car. Lift up handle cover. Slide lever. I move to the next car, hands a little scraped up from the experience.
When I leave the train, I nervously glance behind me, and of course, there he is.
When we reach the turnstiles, I pause.
"No one wants you, girl!" He says, turning his head toward me as he passes. Swearing, I look around for the CTA guard, who is conveniently absent from his or her cubicle. I wait there for a few minutes more before deciding that he wouldn't have bothered to wait outside for me.

And this is why I don't really feel safe in my neighborhood anymore. Along with many other reasons: gunshots, plenty of car alarms, a few more incidents witnessed on the El at my stop, being propositioned for sex, being screamed at by a crazy guy ("Don't go past here! There are niggers everywhere!").

Too bad Uptown is the ghetto, I'd move there.